April 30, 2008

Thy Word

This song has been running through my mind all day. Well, except when I was cleaning up vomit. Then I was concentrating on breathing through my mouth and containing the toxic sludge mess.

Isn’t it true, though?

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.

I think that I, too often, try to read the Bible as a “how to” book, rather than a narrative of God’s love toward me. Like if I do this, this, and this, then God will do that, that, and that. As if He is under any obligation to do a thing for me? Rather, it’s out of His great love that I’m not squashed like a bug. Or worse, abandoned and left to my own devices.

Hah. That reminds me. I was reading Ladybug a story from the Children’s Bible the other night, and, since we were starting at the beginning, we read about Adam and Eve and then Cain and Abel. We got to the part where Cain kills Abel (I’m thinking, Wait, these are stories for children?) and Ladybug says to me, “Oh, he squished him like a bug!” Um, yes, I guess so… how does a small child comprehend death? I guess “squished like a bug” is where I’ll leave it for now.

When I feel afraid, think I’ve lost my way, still You’re there right beside me.

Nothing will I fear as long as You are near. Please be near me to the end.

And He is. Despite the fact that I sometimes read His Word to me like it’s an instruction manual, and all I have to do is comply. Put this there, screw it in, attach this to the left side, ratchet it tightly together, and voila, you have just constructed a perfect life. And don’t worry about the leftover hardware, we always include extras. (THAT many extras? Yes, that many extras.) I mean, yes, there are instructions, and yes, I do need to comply, but it’s so much more about a heart attitude. Rather than “I’m doing this because I have to, not because I want to” jaw clenched attitude, it’s a “I love you and so I want to do things that make you happy” attitude. Kinda like with spouses. But I want you to want to clean the kitchen/rub my feet/go see the Nutcracker. Only that’s a topic for another day!

I will not forget Your love for me, and yet, my heart forever is wandering.

Jesus be my Guide, hold me to Your side, and I will love You to the end.

Oh that wandering heart! Can’t I just take it out and put it there so I can watch it closely? No? You say I need it in me for pumping blood and things like that? Oh. Well, if you say so.

Remember when Amy Grant (who originally sang Thy Word) went *gasp* mainstream, and started singing love songs? Am I the only teenager that couldn’t understand why it wasn’t “Christian” to sing love songs?

Isn’t this a terribly rambly post? Perhaps it’s because Sir Puke-a-Lot (aka Wild Thing) is sleeping. Peacefully. And not in his own vomit. I know this because I have the baby monitor on. And I only have two more loads of laundry to wash, which means I have three more to dry, and four more to fold. Well, might as well get back to it, since my son is slacking off sleeping and not doing the laundry like he’s supposed to.

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