August 12, 2008

Cleaning off my desk / Pilates

I have a big stack of CDs on my desk.  I don’t know what they are, so I get to stick them into my computer, one by one, to find out. 


Here’s what I’ve found:

-          A backup of our financial software, from 2004

-          About 2 dozen CDs with unspecified music on them.  Probably belonging to the Man of the House, since I don’t recognize any of the music, other than as something vaguely reminiscent of things that he has on his iPod

-          My Winsor Pilates 20-Minute Workout DVD. Now THIS is something to celebrate!

I’ve been wanting to exercise.  Because carrying a 28-pound child up and down stairs, and running around the yard chasing my children all day just isn’t doing it for me.  I don’t know WHY.  Maybe it’s because I’m eating animal cookies and cake while I do so.  But still.  To be a little more toned would be great, right? And I’ve read really good things about Pilates.  Unfortunately, my entire experience with Pilates consists of reading, and I’m just not seeing the benefit.  Go figure.



So I tried the Pilates video.  I’m using “tried” in its loosest sense.  I put Ladybug down for her nap, and then Wild Thing and I popped in the DVD. 

I got down on my mat (that I’ve had for 3 years, and only used once—today) and discovered that I don’t have a powerhouse (apparently most people have a band of muscle around their middle, their belly button is the center of it).  And Wild Thing thought it was the perfect opportunity (with me down on the floor) to pull up my shirt and blow on my stomach (where my powerhouse should be).  Slobbery, flabby belly aside, I think I’m supposed to have muscles there.  But I couldn’t really tell, because I kept losing my concentration.  Something about having dolls and balls and toy dishes bonking on my head really messed me up.  And when I stuck my legs in the air and wrapped my arms around them, a 28-pound little boy came hurtling toward me and knocked me on my side.  I don’t think my powerhouse is supposed to let that happen.

Considering the interference from my son, I’m proud that I watched/tried the DVD – all 20 minutes of it.  Of course, other than having bodies that have obviously never borne children, and wearing ugly green outfits (who picked those out, anyway, and why that color green??) the women and the token man on the video are quite inspirational.  In a “we-do-this-all-the-time-and-have-the-bodies-to-prove-it-and-don’t-waste-our-time-doing-laundry-or-caring-for-children-and-I-always-smile-this-serene-smile-as-I-show-off-my-powerhouse-and-pretend-that-I’m-not-dying-of-pain-or-bored-out-of-my-mind” kind of way.  After all, we all have to start somewhere, and at least putting the DVD into the player and turning it on is something.  Right? My clothes will fit looser tomorrow, right?  And since I exercised, I deserve to eat that pint of Cherry Garcia.  I need to keep up my strength for later, when I chase my children around the yard again.

Oh look! It’s nap time for Wild Thing.  Time flies when you’re exercising and having fun aimlessly wasting time.




dede warren said...

I just finished reading your blog start to finish. After reading your latest entries, I thought perhaps you were fighting a terminal illness, I'm glad that's not the case.

We've all made poor choices at one point or another, you're certainly not alone in that. While it's heart breaking for your children and their future without you, I can't help but think this is all your own doing. That being said, I absolutely will pray for you, and that what ever lesson is to be learned, is learned.

Mercy Project said...

Dede, thanks for your comment. And yes, I, along with my whole family and those who love me, am grateful that I'm not dealing with a terminal illness. We have often reminded each other that things could be worse. And it's true.

I agree with you, that this is all my own doing. I've never made any excuses, or blamed anyone other than myself. I've tried never to lose sight of the fact that I am solely responsible for these consequences. Nevertheless, that doesn't negate the difficulty of the situation as it stands. I'm not hoping to elicit any sympathy, only to share my journey.

madrekarin said...

I had a Pilates machine once. It was the best clothes hanger ever! lol
I am now hooked on the Wii my son bought last week. So much fun and really more work than I imagined.
Yay for the continuance. I know it must be a roller coaster, but time is so valuable for you that it has to be a gift.
Take care.

meghan said...

As this post is pretty old Im not sure if you are still interested in Pilates but I am an instructor who sometimes does web-sessions with my clients when they travel. If you have a webcam it might be a fun thing to try! And although I do pilates all the time Ive been known to indulge in a little cherry garcia myself- so my powerhouse is less than video worthy. Still Im healthy and strong and love it. Email me at if you have any interest.