August 11, 2008

Sentencing Hearing, Take Five...

Yes, it was continued, again.  Ten days from now, to August 21.

Despite the fact that I’m living my life in 10-day increments, I’m ok with this.  I have more time with my family (as if any of us are guaranteed time with our families, but you know what I mean), and I get more time to pray about it.  What’s not to love?

Oh sure, the living my life in 10-day increments.  Yeah, that part’s a bummer.  I’m a planner, and as a planner I love to (duh) make plans… and it’s hard not being able to plan any farther than 10 days at a time.  But I can learn to live with that too, at least for a time.

I’ve come to the realization, or maybe it’s more than a realization, maybe it’s an assurance, that this entire process is out of my control, and though it feels like it’s out of control completely, I understand that it’s under God’s control.  There’s something very calming and peaceful in my heart that comes from that. 

So, for the next 10 days, I’ll enjoy the time with my babies, celebrate my 7th wedding anniversary, get together with friends, and continue to keep my hope in God. 

Why so downcast O my soul? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.

Hopefully I’ll be able to share some fun kid stories, maybe a couple pictures, and stay away from all this heavy stuff for a while!



emily said...

Hi Mercy...I just caught up on your most recent few posts...I've been a bit out of blog world for a week or so. My heart goes out to you in this time of extreme loss and discouragement. Still, it is a beautiful story that in the midst of a broken heart, you still have hope.

Reading your posts immediately reminded me of a song by Sarah Masen called "Sorrow's Hymn" And since I think in song lyrics, I thought I would share them with you.

And so my mind aches with sorrows deep down
Breaking my soul inside
It is the sadness that brings my head down
Down on my knees

But I know my Redeemer lives
That's where my heart finds rest
In Him I find the hope to walk on
Down that dark narrow road

I do not settle for pity's excuse
In fact I assume I'm wrong
Falling or flying my soul is confused
As to where destiny pulls

But I know my Redeemer lives
That's where my heart finds rest
In him I find my hope to walk on
Down that dark narrow road
down that dark narrow road

It's a great song. Worth the download. Kind of brooding...but still.

Denise K. said...

Oh, another delay! I can't even begin to imagine the roller coaster ride this is for you! Your attitude is fantastic, and you are so wise in your thoughts, outlook, and grace. Thanks for sharing your story, and as always, I am praying for you during this time of loss and uncertainty. Denise