August 4, 2008

Rant, etc.

Warning: This may be somewhat of a rant…

I did a little research on Friday.  I wanted to know why the prosecutor was taking this case so personally, to try and find out more about this person who was making such vicious attacks on me as a person and as a mother.   So I typed the name into Google and what do you know!! This person sits on the board of a local children’s hospital.  A hospital that has received almost $3 million in donations from the “victim” of my mistake.  Hmmm, starting to make sense now…

If it was a judge, the judge would have to excuse him/herself on the basis that this constitutes a conflict of interest.  Why the prosecutor did not disclose this information is a mystery – it should have been disclosed.   It presents a possible ethical complaint against the prosecutor.  But what good will that do me?

The thing is, I know what I did was wrong.  I made a tremendous mistake, with far-reaching and long-term consequences.  But I think that everything that I have freely and willingly done right to correct that wrong also needs to be considered as well.  Justice is supposed to be blind.  And justice is supposed to be administered with impartiality.  I’m frustrated, and scared, and worried that I’m not going to receive an impartial and blind execution of justice. 

I think I’m done with any rant now.  I guess that was kind of tame, considering how I could go off…

My parents were out of town a this last weekend for a friend’s 60th birthday.  They spent a couple nights there, and when to church with them on Sunday.  My mom shared with me yesterday how a lady at their church came up to her and handed her a piece of paper, and said “God gave me these scriptures for your daughter.  Do you have a daughter?” and then gave her the paper and walked away.  She doesn’t even know the woman, and the woman isn’t aware of anything that is going on with me.  Check out what the verses are:

Isaiah 30:15, 18-19  This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength.  For the Lord longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion.  For the Lord is a God of justice.  Blessed are all who wait for him!  O people of Zion, who live in Jerusalem, you will weep no more.  How gracious he will be when you cry for help.  As soon as he hears, he will answer you.”

Wow.  So I’m thinking that I should take this to heart, and do a little less crying, and a little more crying out for help.

 

 

 

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow! I have no idea who you are and yet me heart aches for you. The thought of leaving my children tears my heart out. I think many people are praying for you, I will more often! I hope with all my heart that you can do community service or something, but you should read "The Hiding Place" by Corrie Ten Beum. She take something very hard and finds a way to keep the Lord with her and to share Him with others. Keep your Faith, and remember "when life gets to hard to stand, KNEEL"

emily said...

WOWEESOWEE. That is crazy awesome. The Lord longs to bring justice? Wait for Him? Talk about right up your alley. I'm with you on the frustrations with the Prosecutor. Talk about a conflict of interest. But isn't it sweet and thoughtful of the Lord to bring you a special message directly from His heart to yours in such a unique, undeniable way? Good for you for recognizing it as coming from His hand.

madrekarin said...

I hope your lawyer is aware of the conflict of interest that is waving like a red flag over the prosecutor. He may just have to recuse himself because of this piece of information.
I have found that when we are in need of help or comfort, Heavenly Father will put someone in our path that can do just that. What a wise woman to listen to the promptings of the Spirit to give you exactly what you needed. There can be no doubt that you are a beloved daughter of God and He is watching out for you.